Bob Smith is in his flat in Vernon Drive
Waiting for his paperboy to arrive.
Bob needs the paper to pack his suitcase
As that night he plans to steal a rare vase.
In his life Bob has always been taking
And recently he took up housebreaking.
Lately Bob has been having a bad time
So he has taken up a life of crime.
He has burgled five properties to date
And looks at his clock as the boy is late.
Bob had thrown out lots of papers that day
And the bin men had taken them away
And now Bob was wishing that he’d kept some
As he feared the paperboy might not come.
He had tidied his flat on the Sunday
As the bins were emptied on a Monday.
Bob went to the door of his first floor flat
And at last a paper lay on his mat.
Bob let out a sigh as he’d all he’d need
To carry out his planned dastardly deed.
Bob put the paper into the suitcase
And then wearily looked around his place.
His furniture had all seen better days
As he’d got his stuff through dubious ways.
Bob had become a better housebreaker
Than he had ever been a homemaker.
Bob was a bit of a lazy fellow
And his wallpaper was turning yellow.
The carpet was also covered with stains
And poor Bob didn’t even have the brains
To improve his lot by changing his ways
So he could enjoy a lot better days.
Bob imagined he was a normal bloke
As he liked to gamble, drink beer and smoke.
As well as not having a lot of brains
Bob’s flat contained his ill-gotten gains.
He thought of each burglary as a job
And that night the house he wanted to rob
Belonged to a couple who were away
Together for a boating holiday.
Bob heard about the couple at lunchtime
0 comments:
Post a Comment